What Happens When You Get What You Want...

"As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live".

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Each week, I never know what I am going to write about. I wait for the message to show up, through a conversation I had with a friend, an experience I saw first-hand or some other form of inspiration that shows up on my doorstep. If there is ever a week that goes by that I don't post something, it is because I didn't feel any special message I felt authentic about sharing. I won't write just to write - I have to feel like there is something I am inspired to let the world know about and hope that there is someone, somewhere, that needed those words at that very moment.

This week, my message comes from the most unsuspecting conversation. I had my high school reunion this week and a group of us met on Sunday (most were still sleeping off the previous two days of reunion celebrating) and played a round of golf. The group had great chemistry, and seemed to laugh more than play.

Throughout the day, we would all swap carts so we could talk to those who we hadn't spent time with yet. Each time we did, I seemed to learn something interesting or inspiring from each person. One person helped me improve my golf game and talked about a new project he is taking on through his business; one talked about 'how to know when you are in the right relationship'; one talked of a recent heart break but a positive mindset; another talked about his time in the middle east fighting for our country; another talked about her goals for 2009. I felt like the theme 'everyone has a story' rang true. Every single person had an interesting story to tell. When I got to the next cartmate, I simply said, 'so tell me about you'. His response is what I choose to write about today.

He started off by saying he had to loose everything, to get what he wanted. Puzzled, I asked him to explain. He mentioned that he used to have a great job, great life, everything was.... great... but he really wanted to meet the right girl. He prayed and asked for God to bring her into his life. Ironically, God did. My friend met the most amazing girl whom he fell in love with immediately. His prayer had been answered.

While one prayer was answered, the other areas of his life that had been so great, crumbled slightly. He lost his job, he moved in with his dad to help him for a while... life as he knew it changed dramatically. I paused and then reacted by telling him how sorry I was to hear this.

But, his response was what left me in awe.

He said, 'don't be sorry, my prayer was answered. I got what I wanted. I asked for God to bring me the love of my life and He has. This other stuff is just stuff. I am rebuilding my life now and slowly but surely, all of the pieces are coming together. But most importantly, I got what I asked for... The rest will just fall in place.'

I was so inspired by his attitude. He knew exactly what he wanted and despite losing other things in his life, he was grateful that God had answered his prayer and he knew it would all work out. He had his priorities in order, he trusted himself and he knew he would be ok. He focused on what he had in his life vs. what he didn't have...

How many times have we had a wonderful opportunity to seize, but we spend so much time staring at what we wish we had or what we lost, that we miss out on what is right in front of us? I've had this trip me up many times.

You have to know what you want, what you are ok with not having and trust yourself that knowing these things will get you through the good and tough times.

I challenge you this week, to focus on what you want, understand what you can live without, and then trust yourself to move forward with these priorities. There are few times in life when all pins line up in a row for us, but if we can be clear on the ones that matter the most , we will know how to stay grateful and positive, even when going through a difficult time.

And my friend... he's getting ready to move to Europe to be with the love of his life. Not too bad of an outcome, I'd say.

Don't be afraid to ask for what you want. Just be ready for it when it comes!

Following Your Path

"True teachers use themselves as bridges over which they invite their students to cross; then, having facilitated their crossing, joyfully collapse, encouraging them to create bridges of their own."-Nikos Kazantzakis

Sometimes I find myself asking, 'how do I know what the 'right' next step is in my life? How do I know which decision to make?'

Many people, whom I think make very good decisions in their lives, use their 'heart' as their brain. They base their next steps on instinct and feeling. Conversely, I also know a lot of people who make successful decisions on the other end of the spectrum - they scientifically analyze data and details and make decisions based on logic.

I don't believe there is one better way to make a decision - each of us have our own ways of finding what's right for ourselves. I do think, however, that there are a few things that each of us can do in order to feel confident and clear on the decisions that we need to make in order to keep ourselves 'on course'.

1.) Find Your Authentic Path

Make decisions in your life based on being you. If you notice that someone you respect tends to make decisions based on x,y or z, do not feel you need to do those same things. Some times I look at my colleagues and successful fitness role models and I see what they did to get where they are and I wonder if I should be doing 'that' too. I've tried to follow the path of others to create my own, and in my experience - that just doesn't work. You must find your own path, designed by your authentic self. Sure, you can pick up bits and pieces from the leadership and decision-making patterns of others who 'have arrived', but you must not let go of your own spirit and way. You are perfect in your own sense and when you are authentically you - you create the path you were meant to walk down. Soon, you'll find others want to know your secret and will try to walk your path too. They will learn, too, that they need to develop their own authentic path. (see #3)

2.) Find A Teacher

One of the most powerful opportunities we have in our lives is to develop relationships. While we must be authentic in our own decisions, we all need a little guidance and support. There will be times we fall, fail, misstep, can't hear our own inner voice or are afraid of what that inner voice is telling us. I believe we all have 1-2 teachers in our lives that 'show us the way'. These are people who we have found an undefinable connection with that aren't afraid to show us 'their secrets to success' and help us to come into our own. These are powerful, life-changing teachers who help us to embrace our authentic selves and make the most of every blessing in our lives. While this 'teacher' is an incredible gift in our lives, some of us are afraid to find our own teacher. We are stubborn, think we can do it on our own, or again, afraid of what that teacher may show us. If that is you, I especially challenge you to break out of that wave of thought and be open to allowing your teacher to come into your life. When we are open to receiving, the teacher appears.

3.) Be A Teacher

Just as we seek our teacher for guidance and support, we also have the gift to be the same for someone else. Just as you are open to receiving your teacher and his/her words, know that someone is seeking the same from you. When you notice someone coming to you who has the same dreams and passion, be open to being a teacher for that person. It just may be one of the most rewarding decisions you make... and, don't be afraid to share, 'your secrets'. Remember, we must all find our own path - so even if you show someone else how you 'did it', they must take your way as a lesson, but carve out their own. You never know - you may learn more from your student than you ever imagined.

I challenge you (and me!) this week, to be clear on who your authentic self is. What is ok and not ok in your life? What do you truly believe and want? What makes you authentically different from the crowd? (Celebrate that!) What makes you come fully alive?

Then, spend some time thinking about the 'teacher' who you have in your life and how much of an impact he/she has made in your world. Are you letting him/her in as much as you can? He/she is there in your life for a reason. Let your teacher be a guide for you.

Finally, consider if you are currently serving in the role as 'teacher' to someone else. If not - can you be? Is there someone waiting in the wings for your outreached hand?

And, after all of this thought - I challenge you to 'be open' to seeing your authentic self(and loving it!), letting your teacher in, and being that teacher to someone else. And then, enjoy the journey. You're right on track.

"A great teacher never strives to explain her vision; she simply invites you to stand beside her and see for yourself."-The Rev. R. Inman

*This blog was inspired by a recent conversation I had with an amazing friend of mine, during a night of stories and observations.

If Today Was Your Last Day

If today was your last day and tomorrow was too late

Could you say goodbye to yesterday?

Would you live each moment like your last?

Leave old pictures in the past

Donate every dime you have?

Would you call old friends you never see?

Reminisce of memories

Would you forgive your enemies?

Would you find that one you're dreamin' of?

Swear up and down to God above

That you finally fall in love

If today was your last day -Nickelback

If you found out that today was your last day, what would you do? The lyrics above ask some intringuing questions. The intrigue doesn't come from acting on those notions, but on the fact that it takes something as dramatic as thinking that today is your last day on earth to conjure up the ability, desire and/or confidence to live life to the fullest.

Why don't we do these things, with the hope that tomorrow isn't our last day? What if we did all of these things today?

• Could you let go of your past? Can you move forward in your life and not look back?
• Could you give away more than you keep; would you help someone else in need just because...
• Would you get back in touch with someone you've been meaning to call and talk for hours about the times you had together, laughing and then wondering how you ever lost touch?
• Would you go out on a limb and be open to meeting the right person that actually could bring you happiness in your life?
• Would you allow yourself to fall madly in love without hesitation, reservation or referring back to the past to predict how you choose to act/feel?

Imagine if you even did half of those things tomorrow... what an amazing day it would be! Do you realize you have this ability? You can make your day come alive! Don't wait for dramatic news to inspire to live out the things in your life that are important. Today is all we are certain of - right here, right now. You have this one moment, and that is the only thing we know for sure. Who knows what the moment next will bring.

So, take this moment, and go do something incredible with it.

Let go of the past. Forgive yourself. Set a new goal. Reach out to an old friend. Inspire a stranger. Give to someone unexpectedly. Open your heart to love. Love fearlessly. Love fully. Love as if you can't be hurt or rejected. Love someone. Love yourself. Love your life. Accept your life. Live your life as if this is your one chance to get it right.

Now go on, this one moment is all we have - go live it to it's fullest.

Get Knocked to Your Knees & Rise Up - Victorious!

The real glory is being knocked to your knees and then coming back. That's real glory. That's the essence of it. - Vince Lombardi

I had the opportunity to attend a luncheon last week that honored Santonio Holmes and Dick LaBeau. I was thrilled to see Santonio Holmes speak - he went to the Ohio State University and played on the National Championship team the same time I was in grad school (at OSU). He went on to play for the Steelers and made the winning touchdown in the Superbowl for the Steelers in 2009.

Surpisingly to me, while I enjoyed seeing Santonio very much - it was Dick LaBeau that brought tears to my eyes.

Dick began by telling us his of experience playing for Woody Hayes at the Ohio State University in the late 1950s. He went on to play for the Detroit Lions for 14 years, and then would spend the next 36 years being the assistance coach for various NFL teams. He explained that he was fired 5 times throughout his career and would continue to move on to the next opportunity, hopeful to have a career high with his next position. At the age of 65, the Buffalo Bills 'let him go' and it was at that point in time when most people are expected to 'retire' and move on to the next stage of life. Dick said he didn't feel ready to do that. While he had pressure and encouragement to 'let go' of coaching and just enjoy his life, he accepted an assistant coaching position with the Pittsburgh Steelers. He has spent the last five years with the Steelers and in those 5 years, he has won 2 AFC Championships and 2 Superbowls. This is more than he had won in the previous 30+ years of coaching combined.

His message to us was this: 'Don't let anyone tell you what you can or cannot do. If you believe in something, go for it. If you get knocked down, get back up. If I would have listened to what everyone else told me to do, or if I would have questioned if I was a good coach because I was 'let go' throughout my entire career, I would have missed out on some of the greatest moments in my coaching life. I believed I was meant to do something and I stayed committed to that passion, despite getting knocked down.'

So I challenge you this week - don't settle for what you have come to know as 'what you are supposed to do'. Shake it up. Be daring. Listen to that inner voice that tells you to go after that thing you really want. We all fall. We all fail. We all get knocked down. We all have choices to keep going in pursuit of our dreams or to give up and move on to some other stage in life. I challenge you to decide what you want and continue. Expect pitfalls, challenge the hurdles. The roadblocks and mountains in your way are only there so you can climb over them. Decide what waits for you up top and begin your journey up. After all, the best moments of your life are just up ahead.

Love, Hope and Try - The Great Risks!

To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. - Author Unknown

Do you go after what you really want? Do you admit how you truly feel? To you put yourself out there, at the possibility of falling flat? If you answered no to any of these, I challenge you this week, to come alive, and decide what it is that you really want.

Have you ever chosen not to love someone because you thought they wouldn't love you back? Have you ever been afraid to fall in love because you knew it might hurt too much when it didn't work out? If you haven't, well then you don't know all the facets of love. Love is not conditional on a two way street. Love comes from liking that person, from the inside out -without the expectation that they will feel the same way. Of course, when it is reciprocated, well, then - you have found that thing we all seek. But, if it isn't returned, 'Love is never lost if not reciprocated, it will flow back and soften and purify the heart.' Love is one of those things that doesn't disappear, it just may come back to you in a different form than you thought. Be open to seeing it in a different shape or form than you pictured it.

Do you hope for things that seem a little 'daydreamer-ish?' Or, does that idea sound foolish? Does the idea of being disappointed by your dream not coming true keep you from having it in the first place? If so, I challenge you to get out there and dream, and dream big. 'If you shoot for the moon and miss, you'll land amongst the stars.'

And finally, do you try for something, knowing it could fail, or do you stay safe and not leave your comfort zone? Always doing what you always did will always get you what you always got. The only way you will see more out of yourself, life and others is to put yourself out there and try. When you fail, fail big and get right back up and go again. Life is not a series of steady, easy, smooth decisions that create an even-keeled life. Life is about getting out there and loving as if you can't be hurt, dreaming as if there are no boundaries to your success and trying as if you couldn't fail.

Life is not a journey to the grave with intentions of arriving safely in a pretty well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming ... WOW! What a ride!

A Treadmill For Two

"The best kind of friend is the one you could sit on a porch swing with, never saying a word, and walk away feeling like that was the best conversation you've ever had. "~ Unknown

"A friend is the one who comes in when the whole world has gone out. "~ Grace Pulpit

As my cycle class was about to begin, a couple walked in. Quiet, smiling, they didn't make any disruption and went right over to some bikes that had been set up. If I hadn't been looking down I would have never noticed the dog that accompanied them. Perfectly behaved, the dog quietly led his owner through the dark room and to her bike. Then, he laid down and watched her cycle, without moving his gaze away from her for one second. As the music pumped, the energy got higher, and the lights flickered in the room, the dog's focus was on her and her alone.

After class, I asked the couple how their ride was and they gave some positive feedback and then I asked, 'was the music ok for him?' and pointed to the dog, a beautiful brown retriever. I had been worried that the music was too loud. They laughed and said, 'no, Happy is used to loud music'. The owner then let me know that she has had Happy for 1.5 years and the dog does everything with her. As she spoke, Happy kept close to her knee and rubbed it with his nose, from time to time, as if to let her know he was there.

She then said, 'in fact, the first time I tried to get on a treadmill, Happy, whose focus is to keep me safe', tried to get on the treadmill too, but it was akward because there wasn't enough room. Happy kept trying because he wanted to be by my side.'

I laughed but inside, my heart swelled to think of how sweet it was that the dog kept trying to get on the treadmill to walk with his mom to protect & guide her. I thought about how unconditional Happy was to his owner. It didn't matter what she was attempting or if he had been trained to know how to do it - whether laying in a cycle class next to his mom riding a stationary bike or attempting to walk on the treadmill with his mom, so that she felt guided and protected, he was always there.

I debated on if I had shown that same level of love for my friends and family. And, I thought about the friends who had show'd that same level of love for me.

How about you? Are you there for someone when they can't see for themselves? Do you go out of your comfort zone to be by their side? Do you gently 'nudge' them to remind them you are there, by calling them, holding their hand or putting your arm around them?

I challenge you this week to 'get on that treadmill' with a good friend. Do something that takes you out of your comfort zone... sit and listen... have patience... be there, even when inconvenient or difficult.

It isn't just the friends that show up for the party; but moreso, it's the friends who stand by your side and love you unconditionally that help to 'see' all that your life can be.

I think Happy's owner may actually 'see' more in life than most people with perfect vision.

So now, go on, get on that moving treadmill.

Let Luck Find You

Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity.

-Coach Darrel Royal

Do you know someone who seems to have luck on their side? They seem to always have the best opportunities, the most unique circumstances, the most incredible outcomes? They seem to be in the right place, at the right time? And, they seem to find the needle in the haystack - the diamond in the rough -they see the things in life that most of us somehow miss.

So, what is this 'lucky charm' they seem to possess, and how do we get one?

While I don't have all the answers (and have my fair share of various forms of luck!), I think finding your own 'lucky charm' is simpler than you think. I promise each one of you reading this that you can increase your luck, no matter where you are in your life, what circumstance you are facing, or what decision(s) you have at your hands, just by adopting two simple principles in your life.

I am a strong believer in the idea of 'like attracting like'. When you focus on the happy things in your life, express gratitude for the opportunities you have (no matter how big or small), and find the joy in each day, you throw a signal out in the world of positivity. When you 'throw this signal' people can't help but be attracted to it and it tends to manifest more opportunities, joy and passion. Pretty soon, it looks like you are just an extremely lucky person, and, that may be a part of it, but you have enabled the 'luck' to find you as well.

In addition, being at the right place isn't enough for luck to occur. If you were waiting to meet the love of your life, and he/she walked past you, would you know what to do? If you were hoping for a promotion and your boss called you into the office tomorrow morning to ask for a business case on why you should be promoted, would you know how to respond? Luck tends to find those who have prepared for the opportunity to present itself.

So, I challenge you to make friends with luck this week. To do this, follow two simple steps.

1.) Throw the signal of joy and gratitude out to the world. Focus on the things that make you fabulous. Embrace each day and look forward to each opportunity. See the glass half full. Do somethat makes someone else smile. Live with energy. I promise you, you'll manifest your luck.

2.) Prepare for what you really want. If you want to meet the person of your dreams, understand how you would react if you really met them. If you want that dream job, decide what you would do in the interview for it. When you prepare for what you want, you'll know what to do when it comes around. Don't miss the opportunity because you didn't recognize it. (Some people suggest creating a 'vision board' that takes what you want and crystallizes it by cutting out images an putting them on paper so you know exactly what you want). Decide what you really want and what you will do with it when you get it. I promise you, when it comes, you will know just how to get it.

Shout from the mountain tops about your present joy - give off that glow; prepare for the opportunities you want to come; celebrate the luck that will follow.

Look For the Lightning to Strike

Love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? Fall head over heels. I say find someone you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart. I'm not hearing any heart. Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back. Because, the truth is there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love - well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived. You never know when lightning may strike. ~William Parrish (from the movie, 'Meet Joe Black').

Love. The most interesting of all topics in the world. It can cause the greatest joy - the deepest pain. It speaks many languages, looks and feels different to each person, and causes incredible confusion, and yet is the most amazing feeling that exists.

Recently, a dear friend of mine told me to watch the movie, 'Meet Joe Black' (she even bought me a copy to ensure I would watch it). I usually don't spend a lot of time watching movies by myself, but for some reason, I was drawn to have a night in, by myself, to view this recommended film.

Within 20 minutes of the movie, I knew I loved it. The quotation above was uttered from a doting father who was trying to counsel his beloved daughter on making sure she married the right man. At the time, she was in a relationship with a man who seemed 'perfect on paper' but didn't bring much excitement, joy or passion to her heart. Her dad told her to 'be open' and look for the 'lightning to strike'.

So many times, we fall into love with the comfortable, verses the passion and joy. I challenge you to keep your heart open to find the passion and joy that only love can bring you. If you have felt it, you know there is no feeling like it in the world. There is nothing better. There is nothing that you can't handle when with the partner that you love with all of your heart. After all, that's why the heart was created. To love. (supplying bloodflow circulation/oxidation is secondary!) Your heart was created to love with every ounce of your being. So why would you be ok with anything but that?

In addition, the movie depicted the idea that true love comes when the other person knows everything about you and loves you just the same... moreover, when you trust someone enough to tell them your deepest secret and trust they won't run away after hearing it.

Sure, this kind of love is hard to find. But I know it is out there.

So how do you find it? I wish I knew the black and white answer. But I can tell you this... Believe that you deserve to be loved by someone with all of their heart, and that you could love someone that much...

and then be open... and look for the lightning to strike.

Live Your Life On Purpose

"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming ... 'Wow! What a ride!'"

I believe that children are smarter than adults in many ways. They understand what it means to live their lives on purpose... They believe in the power of the impossible. They don't take no for an answer. They find joy in simple things. They laugh a lot. They don't mind being silly. They take chances because they don't understand the concept of failure. They know what makes them happy and they spend most of their time focusing on those things. Everything they do - they do, on purpose - to be happy.

As we get older, we rationalize and define the concept of 'impossible' things. When told no, we walk away. We over-analyze situations to try to find happiness vs. looking right in front of us. We tend to spend a lot of time just being 'status quo'. We look around to see who's watching before we allow ourselves to be silly. We don't take chances because we fear failure. We have no idea what makes us happy and spend a lot of time chasing the wrong concepts. Instead of living each day on purpose, many of us find ways to live each day, just going with the flow.

Many of us get caught up in living to make money. We think when we are richer, we will be happier. While I confess that financial abundance is a goal of mine, I also know it will not bring me happiness on it's own. Some of the poorest people have the greatest joys in life, while some of the wealthiest are the poorest in spirit.

Take for example, a study that was done and written about by Whitley Strieber in 'Money Really doesn't Buy Happiness'. On a scale of 1-7 where 1 means 'not at all satisfied with my life' and 7 means 'completely satisfied', the Forbes 400 richest Americans average a 5.8. This is the exact same average as the cattle-herding Masai people of Kenya, who live in dung huts without electricity or running water.

For your weekly challenge, I dare you to embrace the concept of living your life intentionally. Decide one thing you want to have happen this week and make sure prior to the week's end, that you made it happen. Chose to spend more time with your friends. Chose to take a risk that scares you once a day. Laugh by yourself. Chose to understand what will make you happy, and go for it. Forget the words impossible or failure. Live out loud. Live Your Life On Purpose.

Inside-Out Challenge

What you do, the way you think, makes you beautiful. -Scott Westerfeld

'Chris'

I walked into the hospital room to visit 'Chris'. He was a younger boy that I had mentored, and had fallen ill with a terminal disease. When I first met him, he was a physically striking young man -the heartthrob of all the high school girls. He lit up the room with his personality. I had been told to prepare myself because I wouldn't recognize him. The disease had caused him to loose limbs, swell with 85 lbs of water weight, break out in a horrible rash, and loose his hair. I walked into the room, expecting the worse.

I want you to take a moment here to consider what you think you would feel?

I expected to feel sorry for him and be sad. But, he made that almost impossible. As soon as I walked in, Chris' smile lit up the room. He cracked a joke, and gave me a hug. I spent about an hour with him that day and I remember forgetting all about those physical conditions. It was just him... just me - hanging out, cracking jokes and telling stories...just like always. And, when I asked him how he was 'handling everything' - he looked at me for a minute as if he wasn't sure what I meant. I then said, 'I know you wanted to be a professional athlete', and he didn't miss a beat and simply replied, 'Oh yeah, I will just play for a paraplegic team'. And made a bat swing in the air and smiled.

Chris' ability to see his inner beauty taught me more than he will probably ever know. How many times have I lost confidence in myself due to something completely unimportant? And, more significantly, how many times have I missed out on knowing someone fabulous (like Chris) because of some external stereotype or ignorance?

'Kurtis and Brenda'

Then there's Kurtis and Brenda... Kurtis(22) was a younger stock boy at the grocery store, Brenda was a cashier(26). Kurtis asked Brenda out on a date and she kept telling him no, 'it would be impossible'. Kurtis persisted and she finally let him know she had two kids and couldn't afford a babysitter. He offered to pay for the sitter.

The night he showed up, she said she couldn't go, the sitter had cancelled. Kurtis suggested they take the kids to dinner with them. Brenda let Kurtis in to show him that she had a daughter and a younger son. The younger son was in a wheelchair. Brenda assumed he would leave at that point, but Kurtis saw no issue. They went to dinner and had a wonderful time. Kurtis took great care of her son, and even picked him up and carried him when he had to go to the bathroom. Kurtis and Brenda continued to date and eventually got married. They are now Mr. & Mrs. Kurt Warner. (Kurt Warner was the QB for the Arizona Cardinals and took them to the Superbowl and won the NFL's MVP twice).

Kurt's ability to see inner beauty brought him what he now considers his greatest joy. He has mentioned many times in his press conferences that his family far outweighs any Superbowl win, ring or game.

I challenge you this week to make an effort to get to know someone you normally wouldn't; sit and listen to someone's story you haven't given a chance before. Try seeing someone from the inside-out.

You never know - maybe you'll meet someone who will change your life in ways you can't even imagine...

People often say that 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder,' and I say that the most liberating thing about beauty is realizing that you are the beholder. This empowers us to find beauty in places where others have not dared to look, including inside ourselves. -Salma Hayek

The heart has reasons that reason does not understand

'Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself, and that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams...' -Paul Coelho (from The Alchemist)

'The heart has reasons that reason does not understand.' -Jacques Benigne Bossuel

'Once you have loved, You will always love. For what's in your mind may escape, but what's in your heart will remain forever. There is no instinct like that of the heart.' -Lord Byron

Celebrate the week of the heart!

Between honoring National Heart Disease Awareness Day (Go Red!) and Valentine's Day (Go Love!), this is a special week to focus on taking care of your heart. You can do this by making a sincere effort to: exercise, eat well, follow a passion and/or love someone. All of these things help to keep the heart in it's best shape - happy and healthy!

I chose to start off this message with the quotes above because they all come back to the same idea. The heart will drive us to our best moments. Following our heart - even when scary or uncertain - brings us our greatest riches. The feelings the heart produces are far more amazing than anything else we are capable of... they bring us our greatest joy.

This week, I challenge to stop being afraid of what your heart tells you and follow your passion. Take a chance. Put yourself out there. Be vulnerable. Love someone without expecting them to love you back. Suggest a new idea that sounds crazy. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and open your soul to listen to what your heart is asking for... it will tell you very clearly what it needs, wants and loves. You just have to listen for it.

So, how will you take care of your heart this week? Loving someone doesn't take much - a simple gesture will do. You have no idea how much one small moment of affection can do for someone else. You could change their entire day. So what is stopping you? Go after that heart of yours!

'Follow your heart, but be quiet for a while first. Ask questions, then feel the answer. Learn to trust your heart....' -Unknown.

My Message is My Life

My message is my life. - Mahatma Gandhi

This weekend I talked with a friend of mine who wanted to discuss how we know what our purpose in life is... it is always an interesting question to consider. I am not one to claim to have the answer, but I do have a few ideas.

So often, we spend time focusing on what huge impact we can have - some enormous purpose to existing. But I ask you to pause for a moment and then name the last 5 Nobel Peace Prize winners. Or perhaps, 5 Senators from your state or the current top 10 Best Selling Novelists.

Perhaps you can, but more likely, you cannot.

Now I ask you to name your 5 favorite teachers, your 5 greatest friends and your 5 strongest role models. The point to this little exercise is to prove that people don't remember those who won a fancy award or prize, they remember the people who were there for them, touched their hearts and influenced their life for the better.

So that is our purpose. To learn from our lessons to help others have a lighter road, to be open to new experiences, to find passion in the things we love and to love as if there was no such thing as being hurt.

When we start to feel off-track in life, that is just our heart taking the steering wheel and telling us to head in a different direction. It is important to pay attention to these times (and we all have them, so don't worry), because they can be the wind in our sails that drive us right to discovering 'our purpose'. When we are following our hearts, finding our simple joys, being there for others - then we have found our purpose. It's not a moment. It's not a major award. It is how we choose to live in each moment.

My message is my life.. Such a fabulous way to say - everything I do, every day of my life, is what I leave behind. So make sure you leave behind exactly what you want to. You have the ability to leave an imprint on this world anyway you want. What will your imprint be?

It's Not the Days... It's the Moments

'We do not remember days, we remember moments'. -Caesare Pavese

As the New Year kicked off, I spent some time in reflection, not only over this past year, but of my life in general. I thought about old friends and new friends, adventures and travels, unexpected joy, and times I laughed until I cried. It dawned on me that it is easy to think about our lives in terms accomplishments. We tend to place value on the successes in life.

I challenge you to consider thinking about your life differently. Think about your life in terms of the moments that have brought you the most joy. It is likely, those moments aren't the ones where you received a degree, got a first job or made a paycheck. Those moments are the ones you make, when you don't realize you are making them - when you are with family, or friends, finding the joy in eachother and appreciating eachother - simply.

When I think of my fondest moment, while I have many, the first one that comes to mind is when when I spent time with a friend. We didn't do anything unique or special. We actually stayed in and watched movies, danced to music off of itunes on our computer and made eachother laugh until we cried by telling stories of our lives. My cheeks hurt for a whole day after... There was nothing significant about this time except for we had found simple joy in spending time together. Whenever I have a down moment, it is easy to think back to watching my friend dance like no one was watching and me falling on the floor - unable to get up because I was laughing so hard. I feel that same joy overwhelm my heart as I did in the actual moment.

It is not significant accomplishments that makes our lives rich - it is those times that bring joy to our hearts, tears to our eyes, and a tireless smile to our faces.

I challenge you this week to consider this ... while goals and accomplishments are great things to inspire us - they are not what makes our lives rich. Spend some time thinking back to the last time you smiled with your eyes, laughed til you hurt, and found simple joy - in the presence of a good friend. These are the things that make our lives.

There are no ordinary moments - so make sure you are able to find the joy in each one.