Get In Your Zone

Life is all memory, except for the one present moment that goes by you so quickly you hardly catch it going. - Tennessee Williams

She walked into my yoga/pilates class in tears. She silently placed a mat down, sat on it, and had her phone out next to her. She checked that it was on vibrate (but still on) and checked several more times before the class started - as if she was hopeful to see someone had called.

I walked up to the stage and asked my typical 'starting off questions'. 'What was the pulse of the class? Was it a good day? Was it a bad day? Why did people come to class? Strength? Confidence? Energy? De-stress? How did people want to feel when they left? Energized? Happy? Powerful?'

I had my eye on her, to see how she would respond. She sat unresponsive. I knew her mind was somewhere else.

I then told the class that I needed each person to be willing to let go of whatever was on their mind and choose to be present in the moment of what we were doing. I said, 'if you just go through the motions, you'll just have a mediocre workout, but if you think about connecting your movement, with your breath, with your thoughts, with your goals, then you will find yourself present.' I glanced at her one more time and she was checking her phone.

We began class and I can always tell those who have been able to let go of their 'outside of the studio stress' and allow themselves to be inwardly focused on themselves for the hour. I call this, 'getting into their zone'. I always know without doubt, that they leave feeling better than they came. I know when they walk out of the studio, they will be able to deal with whatever comes their way, better, with more patience and strength.

*Back to class* Halfway through class I looked over during a difficult transition where we end up in a reverse triangle and our heads are low to the ground. When in this pose, she was looking at her phone.

I brought us out of this sequence and paused in a prayer position for a moment and said, 'I know that when we are going through a difficult time, it is painful to let go of the outside chatter. If someone has left us, something didn't work out, something failed miserably - whatever it is - there is nothing you can do except get your heart in the right place to handle it. This is a choice you make right here, right now. You can choose to hold onto that and feel miserable and go through the motions of this class, and then go through the motions of life when you leave. Or, you can chose right now to honor your body, how amazing it is, think about the next step you take and be aware of the breath coming into your body. You can chose to be at your best right now - no one is stopping you but you. If you let some outside distraction stop you, then that distraction has won.'

We went back into our vinyasa flow and I looked over. At first I thought she was packing up to leave, but I quickly learned she was putting her phone away into a bag and walked it over to the side of the room. She came back and finished class with one of the best 'present moments' I have ever witnessed.

After class she came up to me and told me her story. She was going through a breakup with the 'love of her life'. She had been lethargic for days and could not bring herself to want to do anything but cry (been there, done that!) She said she had tried going to the gym 3 other times but would leave in tears, unable to finish her workout because she was so upset. She said she wasn't sure if she could make it through tonight, but when I said, 'if you let that outside distraction stop you from being present, then it has won...' it all made sense to her. While she didn't like how she was feeling, it was because she missed the past and longed for the future with her boyfriend. She didn't enjoy the present of being right here, right now.

Later that week, I received an email from her. She said that she practiced being present at work, as well as out to dinner with her friends. She focused on being into each conversation, being her best, and enjoying the moment. She said she finally figured out how to let go of what she couldn't control, by focusing on being present with who she was right at this moment. Amazingly enough... the moment she had this realization, he called.

Now it's up to her to determine what to do with this next moment. I am confident that she has all the tools that she needs to make the right decision for her. Afterall, those are the tools you learn when focusing on being present and honoring yourself.

I know I have found myself in this place before. When something is out of your control that you want desperately - perhaps a love - a job - a friend, it can be overwhelming and creates a lot of anxiety and stress. I have found if I can bring myself to be present in the moment and reflect inwardly on taking care of me - then I can overcome whatever heartbreak or disappointment I have faced. It is easier said than done, that is for sure. But, I recommend finding a good yoga class or unconditional friend as a starter...

Here's to this moment. May you 'get in your zone' and be fully aware of how fabulous you really are...

"Each today, well-lived, makes yesterday a dream of happiness and each tomorrow a vision of hope. Look, therefore, to this one day, for it and it alone is life." - Sanskrit poem

"You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment." - Henry David Thoreau

"Life brings simple pleasures to us every day. It is up to us to make them wonderful memories." -- Cathy Allen

Brick Walls Are There On Purpose

''Brick Walls' are there to stop the people that don't want it badly enough.'

- Randy Pausch

A few years ago, I had what I felt would be my first big break. A talent scout from NYC called me and told me he would pay for me to fly to Dallas to teach at a fitness show. The 'gig' consisted of me teaching on stage 3 times during a 2 day show, in which 90,000 people were expected to attend. He said his agency picks 1-2 'up-and-comers' in the fitness industry to support and rally behind. His agency had come across my portfolio and they had selected me. I checked out their website and the show's website and it seemed legitimate, and so I signed on.

I couldn't have been more excited. This was the start of what I had dreamed of... I went shopping and bought 5 new fitness outfits, packed my best business suits (he told me I would be going to dinners with agents and other 'important' people), I took my computers, video cameras, full inventory of my fitness videos, posters etc.

Upon arrival, I found that the fitness show had not been promoted, and while there were a lot of vendors, there weren't any people in attendance. The vendors were livid, the 'talent' (the group I was in) that was to perform was annoyed, and the people producing the event couldn't be found. I decided to make the best of what seemed to be a 'bad' situation, and I set up my video camera, got on stage, turned up the microphone, and just started doing what I came to do. I pulled everyone at the show out on to the floor and started teaching and bringing some energy into the room. While it was a small turnout, I took advantage of the experience and had a lot of fun. God bless the older couple that hung out at the front of the stage the entire time I was up there, as if I was a rockstar and they were pumping their fists and hooping and hollering for me the entire 40 minutes. We all need those people to get us through. Where ever you are, my groupy couple - thank you. You kept me going.

When I finished, I found that anyone who had come out on the floor to workout with me, flocked to me for my video and autograph. While it wasn't what I had been promised (by any means), the experience on day 1 was fun and I was happy with myself for seeing how I could take lemons and make lemonade.

On day two, half of the vendors didn't return, and most of the talent flew home (some the big names that arrived were threatening to sue!). The show seemed even more 'shanty' than the day before. But again, I got on stage and did what I came to do. My life motto has been to make a difference to the lives of others - so whether that is 3 people or 300,000. They all count.

Afterwards, I had the same small flow of 'fans' asking for videos and autographs. I had kept my DVDs in my car as I would be going to the airport after I finished and so all of my luggage was in my rental car. I went out to my rental car to get a few videos and I had an eerie feeling. Something didn't feel right. I had parked in the secure, covered lot attached to the Dallas Convention Center. I had parked close to the doors I had walked into - and hadn't thought much about it. When I got to my rental car, I found it had been broken into and all of my inventory, cameras, computers, clothing, jewelry.... gone.

I called the police and they came and said my car had been parked from the 1 angle in the garage that the security cameras couldn't reach. They said that it was common for thieves to camp out in garages on Sundays, as they know this is the last day of a show and most people working a show will have their luggage... an ideal day to steal out of cars. So- I just so happened to park in the wrong spot, at the wrong time, and - all of my stuff was gone. I went back inside and told the other vendors (in case they wanted to check their cars) and they came up with all of these conspiracy theories on how the whole weekend had been a scam and my car had been broken into by the same scam artists that got us to come to the show in the first place.

Deciding not to spend time in this negative thought, I left the show, got into my rental car, bagless, and drove to the airport. I remember feeling numb. I wanted to cry, but I also couldn't believe what had happened. Not only had it not been my 'big break' in terms of getting discovered, but it was a 'big break' to my possessions - everything I had for my business (that I had built over two years) and my favorite jewelry, clothing etc, was gone. Somehow, I remained calm, saying over and over again, 'it's just stuff, Julie... it's just stuff.'

It wasn't until I got to the airport check-in and the friendly airline woman asked me if I had any bags to check, that I started to cry. She had to be so surprised - I may have been the first person on Earth who broke down in tears at the asking of that question. But, I quickly pulled myself together, smiled and told her I had just 'had a moment' but was now fine.

During my flight home, I thought about what happened... Was this a sign? Was I a fool to think I was going to get that big break? I would now have to start over again with my business. The idea felt a bit exhausting and I had no idea where I would get the money to do that... I had spent my savings over the past 2 years starting my company, buying my equipment, contracting with video production companies, shooting my videos, hiring distribution centers to fill my orders, working with graphic designers to build my brand and make my posters, DVD covers, banners, website logos etc. It felt like it was all gone.

Was this a way of God telling me I was off track and shouldn't pursue this dream? Was I forcing something that wasn't meant to be?

I asked myself those questions a good portion of the flight back. And you know, the funny thing is, every time I asked one of those questions, my soul, my heart and my head all immediately answered in unison, 'Nope. You're fine. Just keep going. This is what you were meant to do. It's just a stumble, not an ending'. I actually heard myself say, 'I know this event will make my business even better'.

Two years later, I have shot 8 more videos, am on tap to shoot 5 more in the near future, am writing a book, have shot commercials for products and events, am a spokeperson and ambassador for various health philanthropies and fitness initiatives and have been in over 15 other fitness shows and conferences that were actually legitimate.

As I look back, I realize, that the 'Dallas' pitfall helped me to see how committed I was to my dream. If I was wishy-washy about it, I would have quit and moved on to another passion or idea. But I knew, without waiver, that this is what I am supposed to do in my life. Showing others how fabulous fitness can feel is what I am here for... if anything, the pitfall just made me want it more. (And don't get me wrong, while my business has taken off, I still have a long ways to go to reach my goals and dreams for it. But, I know what I want, and I know it is possible.)

So, I challenge you, to see the small hurdles and missteps in your life as blessings. They help you to decide how bad you really want something. Those brick walls are there to be overcome. You just have to decide you are up for the challenge. And, then... enjoy the journey and all of the bumps and turns along the way.

And, when you get the chance, find a way to be that rockstar groupy in the front row, pumping your fists and hooping and hollering for someone else who is on their journey. My groupy couple kept me on that stage. They have no idea what their energy did for me that day. So, go give your hoops and hollers to someone. You will make all the difference.

If Today Was Your Last Day

If today was your last day and tomorrow was too late

Could you say goodbye to yesterday?

Would you live each moment like your last?

Leave old pictures in the past

Donate every dime you have?

Would you call old friends you never see?

Reminisce of memories

Would you forgive your enemies?

Would you find that one you're dreamin' of?

Swear up and down to God above

That you finally fall in love

If today was your last day -Nickelback

If you found out that today was your last day, what would you do? The lyrics above ask some intringuing questions. The intrigue doesn't come from acting on those notions, but on the fact that it takes something as dramatic as thinking that today is your last day on earth to conjure up the ability, desire and/or confidence to live life to the fullest.

Why don't we do these things, with the hope that tomorrow isn't our last day? What if we did all of these things today?

• Could you let go of your past? Can you move forward in your life and not look back?
• Could you give away more than you keep; would you help someone else in need just because...
• Would you get back in touch with someone you've been meaning to call and talk for hours about the times you had together, laughing and then wondering how you ever lost touch?
• Would you go out on a limb and be open to meeting the right person that actually could bring you happiness in your life?
• Would you allow yourself to fall madly in love without hesitation, reservation or referring back to the past to predict how you choose to act/feel?

Imagine if you even did half of those things tomorrow... what an amazing day it would be! Do you realize you have this ability? You can make your day come alive! Don't wait for dramatic news to inspire to live out the things in your life that are important. Today is all we are certain of - right here, right now. You have this one moment, and that is the only thing we know for sure. Who knows what the moment next will bring.

So, take this moment, and go do something incredible with it.

Let go of the past. Forgive yourself. Set a new goal. Reach out to an old friend. Inspire a stranger. Give to someone unexpectedly. Open your heart to love. Love fearlessly. Love fully. Love as if you can't be hurt or rejected. Love someone. Love yourself. Love your life. Accept your life. Live your life as if this is your one chance to get it right.

Now go on, this one moment is all we have - go live it to it's fullest.

Get Knocked to Your Knees & Rise Up - Victorious!

The real glory is being knocked to your knees and then coming back. That's real glory. That's the essence of it. - Vince Lombardi

I had the opportunity to attend a luncheon last week that honored Santonio Holmes and Dick LaBeau. I was thrilled to see Santonio Holmes speak - he went to the Ohio State University and played on the National Championship team the same time I was in grad school (at OSU). He went on to play for the Steelers and made the winning touchdown in the Superbowl for the Steelers in 2009.

Surpisingly to me, while I enjoyed seeing Santonio very much - it was Dick LaBeau that brought tears to my eyes.

Dick began by telling us his of experience playing for Woody Hayes at the Ohio State University in the late 1950s. He went on to play for the Detroit Lions for 14 years, and then would spend the next 36 years being the assistance coach for various NFL teams. He explained that he was fired 5 times throughout his career and would continue to move on to the next opportunity, hopeful to have a career high with his next position. At the age of 65, the Buffalo Bills 'let him go' and it was at that point in time when most people are expected to 'retire' and move on to the next stage of life. Dick said he didn't feel ready to do that. While he had pressure and encouragement to 'let go' of coaching and just enjoy his life, he accepted an assistant coaching position with the Pittsburgh Steelers. He has spent the last five years with the Steelers and in those 5 years, he has won 2 AFC Championships and 2 Superbowls. This is more than he had won in the previous 30+ years of coaching combined.

His message to us was this: 'Don't let anyone tell you what you can or cannot do. If you believe in something, go for it. If you get knocked down, get back up. If I would have listened to what everyone else told me to do, or if I would have questioned if I was a good coach because I was 'let go' throughout my entire career, I would have missed out on some of the greatest moments in my coaching life. I believed I was meant to do something and I stayed committed to that passion, despite getting knocked down.'

So I challenge you this week - don't settle for what you have come to know as 'what you are supposed to do'. Shake it up. Be daring. Listen to that inner voice that tells you to go after that thing you really want. We all fall. We all fail. We all get knocked down. We all have choices to keep going in pursuit of our dreams or to give up and move on to some other stage in life. I challenge you to decide what you want and continue. Expect pitfalls, challenge the hurdles. The roadblocks and mountains in your way are only there so you can climb over them. Decide what waits for you up top and begin your journey up. After all, the best moments of your life are just up ahead.

Love, Hope and Try - The Great Risks!

To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. - Author Unknown

Do you go after what you really want? Do you admit how you truly feel? To you put yourself out there, at the possibility of falling flat? If you answered no to any of these, I challenge you this week, to come alive, and decide what it is that you really want.

Have you ever chosen not to love someone because you thought they wouldn't love you back? Have you ever been afraid to fall in love because you knew it might hurt too much when it didn't work out? If you haven't, well then you don't know all the facets of love. Love is not conditional on a two way street. Love comes from liking that person, from the inside out -without the expectation that they will feel the same way. Of course, when it is reciprocated, well, then - you have found that thing we all seek. But, if it isn't returned, 'Love is never lost if not reciprocated, it will flow back and soften and purify the heart.' Love is one of those things that doesn't disappear, it just may come back to you in a different form than you thought. Be open to seeing it in a different shape or form than you pictured it.

Do you hope for things that seem a little 'daydreamer-ish?' Or, does that idea sound foolish? Does the idea of being disappointed by your dream not coming true keep you from having it in the first place? If so, I challenge you to get out there and dream, and dream big. 'If you shoot for the moon and miss, you'll land amongst the stars.'

And finally, do you try for something, knowing it could fail, or do you stay safe and not leave your comfort zone? Always doing what you always did will always get you what you always got. The only way you will see more out of yourself, life and others is to put yourself out there and try. When you fail, fail big and get right back up and go again. Life is not a series of steady, easy, smooth decisions that create an even-keeled life. Life is about getting out there and loving as if you can't be hurt, dreaming as if there are no boundaries to your success and trying as if you couldn't fail.

Life is not a journey to the grave with intentions of arriving safely in a pretty well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming ... WOW! What a ride!

Look For the Lightning to Strike

Love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? Fall head over heels. I say find someone you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart. I'm not hearing any heart. Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back. Because, the truth is there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love - well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived. You never know when lightning may strike. ~William Parrish (from the movie, 'Meet Joe Black').

Love. The most interesting of all topics in the world. It can cause the greatest joy - the deepest pain. It speaks many languages, looks and feels different to each person, and causes incredible confusion, and yet is the most amazing feeling that exists.

Recently, a dear friend of mine told me to watch the movie, 'Meet Joe Black' (she even bought me a copy to ensure I would watch it). I usually don't spend a lot of time watching movies by myself, but for some reason, I was drawn to have a night in, by myself, to view this recommended film.

Within 20 minutes of the movie, I knew I loved it. The quotation above was uttered from a doting father who was trying to counsel his beloved daughter on making sure she married the right man. At the time, she was in a relationship with a man who seemed 'perfect on paper' but didn't bring much excitement, joy or passion to her heart. Her dad told her to 'be open' and look for the 'lightning to strike'.

So many times, we fall into love with the comfortable, verses the passion and joy. I challenge you to keep your heart open to find the passion and joy that only love can bring you. If you have felt it, you know there is no feeling like it in the world. There is nothing better. There is nothing that you can't handle when with the partner that you love with all of your heart. After all, that's why the heart was created. To love. (supplying bloodflow circulation/oxidation is secondary!) Your heart was created to love with every ounce of your being. So why would you be ok with anything but that?

In addition, the movie depicted the idea that true love comes when the other person knows everything about you and loves you just the same... moreover, when you trust someone enough to tell them your deepest secret and trust they won't run away after hearing it.

Sure, this kind of love is hard to find. But I know it is out there.

So how do you find it? I wish I knew the black and white answer. But I can tell you this... Believe that you deserve to be loved by someone with all of their heart, and that you could love someone that much...

and then be open... and look for the lightning to strike.

Inside-Out Challenge

What you do, the way you think, makes you beautiful. -Scott Westerfeld

'Chris'

I walked into the hospital room to visit 'Chris'. He was a younger boy that I had mentored, and had fallen ill with a terminal disease. When I first met him, he was a physically striking young man -the heartthrob of all the high school girls. He lit up the room with his personality. I had been told to prepare myself because I wouldn't recognize him. The disease had caused him to loose limbs, swell with 85 lbs of water weight, break out in a horrible rash, and loose his hair. I walked into the room, expecting the worse.

I want you to take a moment here to consider what you think you would feel?

I expected to feel sorry for him and be sad. But, he made that almost impossible. As soon as I walked in, Chris' smile lit up the room. He cracked a joke, and gave me a hug. I spent about an hour with him that day and I remember forgetting all about those physical conditions. It was just him... just me - hanging out, cracking jokes and telling stories...just like always. And, when I asked him how he was 'handling everything' - he looked at me for a minute as if he wasn't sure what I meant. I then said, 'I know you wanted to be a professional athlete', and he didn't miss a beat and simply replied, 'Oh yeah, I will just play for a paraplegic team'. And made a bat swing in the air and smiled.

Chris' ability to see his inner beauty taught me more than he will probably ever know. How many times have I lost confidence in myself due to something completely unimportant? And, more significantly, how many times have I missed out on knowing someone fabulous (like Chris) because of some external stereotype or ignorance?

'Kurtis and Brenda'

Then there's Kurtis and Brenda... Kurtis(22) was a younger stock boy at the grocery store, Brenda was a cashier(26). Kurtis asked Brenda out on a date and she kept telling him no, 'it would be impossible'. Kurtis persisted and she finally let him know she had two kids and couldn't afford a babysitter. He offered to pay for the sitter.

The night he showed up, she said she couldn't go, the sitter had cancelled. Kurtis suggested they take the kids to dinner with them. Brenda let Kurtis in to show him that she had a daughter and a younger son. The younger son was in a wheelchair. Brenda assumed he would leave at that point, but Kurtis saw no issue. They went to dinner and had a wonderful time. Kurtis took great care of her son, and even picked him up and carried him when he had to go to the bathroom. Kurtis and Brenda continued to date and eventually got married. They are now Mr. & Mrs. Kurt Warner. (Kurt Warner was the QB for the Arizona Cardinals and took them to the Superbowl and won the NFL's MVP twice).

Kurt's ability to see inner beauty brought him what he now considers his greatest joy. He has mentioned many times in his press conferences that his family far outweighs any Superbowl win, ring or game.

I challenge you this week to make an effort to get to know someone you normally wouldn't; sit and listen to someone's story you haven't given a chance before. Try seeing someone from the inside-out.

You never know - maybe you'll meet someone who will change your life in ways you can't even imagine...

People often say that 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder,' and I say that the most liberating thing about beauty is realizing that you are the beholder. This empowers us to find beauty in places where others have not dared to look, including inside ourselves. -Salma Hayek

The heart has reasons that reason does not understand

'Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself, and that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams...' -Paul Coelho (from The Alchemist)

'The heart has reasons that reason does not understand.' -Jacques Benigne Bossuel

'Once you have loved, You will always love. For what's in your mind may escape, but what's in your heart will remain forever. There is no instinct like that of the heart.' -Lord Byron

Celebrate the week of the heart!

Between honoring National Heart Disease Awareness Day (Go Red!) and Valentine's Day (Go Love!), this is a special week to focus on taking care of your heart. You can do this by making a sincere effort to: exercise, eat well, follow a passion and/or love someone. All of these things help to keep the heart in it's best shape - happy and healthy!

I chose to start off this message with the quotes above because they all come back to the same idea. The heart will drive us to our best moments. Following our heart - even when scary or uncertain - brings us our greatest riches. The feelings the heart produces are far more amazing than anything else we are capable of... they bring us our greatest joy.

This week, I challenge to stop being afraid of what your heart tells you and follow your passion. Take a chance. Put yourself out there. Be vulnerable. Love someone without expecting them to love you back. Suggest a new idea that sounds crazy. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and open your soul to listen to what your heart is asking for... it will tell you very clearly what it needs, wants and loves. You just have to listen for it.

So, how will you take care of your heart this week? Loving someone doesn't take much - a simple gesture will do. You have no idea how much one small moment of affection can do for someone else. You could change their entire day. So what is stopping you? Go after that heart of yours!

'Follow your heart, but be quiet for a while first. Ask questions, then feel the answer. Learn to trust your heart....' -Unknown.

My Message is My Life

My message is my life. - Mahatma Gandhi

This weekend I talked with a friend of mine who wanted to discuss how we know what our purpose in life is... it is always an interesting question to consider. I am not one to claim to have the answer, but I do have a few ideas.

So often, we spend time focusing on what huge impact we can have - some enormous purpose to existing. But I ask you to pause for a moment and then name the last 5 Nobel Peace Prize winners. Or perhaps, 5 Senators from your state or the current top 10 Best Selling Novelists.

Perhaps you can, but more likely, you cannot.

Now I ask you to name your 5 favorite teachers, your 5 greatest friends and your 5 strongest role models. The point to this little exercise is to prove that people don't remember those who won a fancy award or prize, they remember the people who were there for them, touched their hearts and influenced their life for the better.

So that is our purpose. To learn from our lessons to help others have a lighter road, to be open to new experiences, to find passion in the things we love and to love as if there was no such thing as being hurt.

When we start to feel off-track in life, that is just our heart taking the steering wheel and telling us to head in a different direction. It is important to pay attention to these times (and we all have them, so don't worry), because they can be the wind in our sails that drive us right to discovering 'our purpose'. When we are following our hearts, finding our simple joys, being there for others - then we have found our purpose. It's not a moment. It's not a major award. It is how we choose to live in each moment.

My message is my life.. Such a fabulous way to say - everything I do, every day of my life, is what I leave behind. So make sure you leave behind exactly what you want to. You have the ability to leave an imprint on this world anyway you want. What will your imprint be?

Believe In It All The Way

When you believe a thing, believe in it all the way. - Walt Disney

Our belief at the beginning of a doubtful undertaking is the one thing that assures the successful outcome of any venture. - William James

You can be anything you want to be. You can have anything you want to have. You can do anything you want to do. The common thread as to why people aren't who they want to be, don't have what they want to have and don't do what they want to do is because they lose their belief in the possibility of it.

Why? Because it is easier to fail. It is easier to give up. It is easier to go with the flow and not be different. It is easier to just be like everyone else. But, in settling for easier, we lose the very sense of what we were put on this earth to do. And, most importantly, we lose the sense of who were are and what brings joy in our lives.

I recently worked with a woman who was in her 70's. She hired me to train her because she wanted to be able to walk with her husband at night. She had tried countless exercise programs and had failed - for over 20 years. She let me know that she has wanted to be her husband's walking partner for those 20 years and each night, just watches him out the window as he takes his walk (and pretends it doesn't bother her). I asked her if she believed she could ever be capable of taking that walk with her husband and she said she did. That belief was all we needed.

Prior to beginning her fitness journey, she could only walk from her house to the car. In addition, she had been taking medication for Diabetes and high blood pressure for 20+ years. Her body fat composition measured well-over 40% bodyfat (30% is considered obese). She had gotten accustomed to living a sedentary life. But she wanted something different for herself. She no longer wanted to watch her husband walk alone. She no longer wanted to be winded walking to the car. She no longer wanted to sit back and watch life pass her by. She believed she could be different.

After six months of intensive conditioning, I just received a phone call from her. She is vacationing in Florida. It is the first time in 20+ years that she got on a plane and took a vacation. She mentioned she has gone off of almost all medication, and is wearing a clothing size she can't remember ever fitting in before...

And most importantly... tonight, their first night on vacation... she and her husband walked the entire resort. She mentioned they hadn't laughed so hard since their first year of dating. She said she felt like a teenager again. And, as they rounded the corner back to the hotel, hand-in-hand, she asked him, 'want to take another lap?' He smiled and told her she was going to wear him out. And, they took that second lap.

The only difference between this time and the previous 20 years of failure was her commitment to believing it was possible.

What do you believe is possible for yourself? What's stopping you?

It's Not the Days... It's the Moments

'We do not remember days, we remember moments'. -Caesare Pavese

As the New Year kicked off, I spent some time in reflection, not only over this past year, but of my life in general. I thought about old friends and new friends, adventures and travels, unexpected joy, and times I laughed until I cried. It dawned on me that it is easy to think about our lives in terms accomplishments. We tend to place value on the successes in life.

I challenge you to consider thinking about your life differently. Think about your life in terms of the moments that have brought you the most joy. It is likely, those moments aren't the ones where you received a degree, got a first job or made a paycheck. Those moments are the ones you make, when you don't realize you are making them - when you are with family, or friends, finding the joy in eachother and appreciating eachother - simply.

When I think of my fondest moment, while I have many, the first one that comes to mind is when when I spent time with a friend. We didn't do anything unique or special. We actually stayed in and watched movies, danced to music off of itunes on our computer and made eachother laugh until we cried by telling stories of our lives. My cheeks hurt for a whole day after... There was nothing significant about this time except for we had found simple joy in spending time together. Whenever I have a down moment, it is easy to think back to watching my friend dance like no one was watching and me falling on the floor - unable to get up because I was laughing so hard. I feel that same joy overwhelm my heart as I did in the actual moment.

It is not significant accomplishments that makes our lives rich - it is those times that bring joy to our hearts, tears to our eyes, and a tireless smile to our faces.

I challenge you this week to consider this ... while goals and accomplishments are great things to inspire us - they are not what makes our lives rich. Spend some time thinking back to the last time you smiled with your eyes, laughed til you hurt, and found simple joy - in the presence of a good friend. These are the things that make our lives.

There are no ordinary moments - so make sure you are able to find the joy in each one.

Do It Anyway

This week's blog is inspired from a sign that hung on a wall in Mother Teresa's office. (see end of blog)

It is easy to let life get us down. When we get hurt by others, we tend to trust less. When we give all we have and 'fail' anyways, we learn not to try so hard. When we go out of our way to help someone, and they end up being ungrateful, we back down from being so generous. When we spend our lives building our homes, our banks, and our sense of being and then a tragedy takes them all away - we feel helpless and broken - afraid to start over again. When we put our hearts 'out there' and they get broken, they become numb and choose to not let themselves be as vulnerable next time.

But - we have two choices each moment. Whenever something comes into our lives we didn't want, expect or ask for - we can choose to let it get the best of us or we can chose to overcome it and let it bring out the best in us. Letting it get the best of us kills our spirit, while letting it bring out the best in us awakens our spirit and allows us to be more fully alive. How powerful would it be to fail, and fail magnificently at that, and yet, smile, and keep moving forward, as if it was just a bump in the road? In other words, if you fall (and we all do!), fall forwards.

I challenge you this week, and each one following - in those times when life is throwing you a curveball, when you feel broken, when you have been hurt, when you have 'failed' - GIVE THE WORLD THE BEST YOU'VE GOT ANYWAY. In doing that - you will overcome the 'stuff' that has weighed you down in the past and you will rise above that 'stuff' to live the life you were meant to live.


Do It Anyway
People are unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered,

LOVE THEM ANYWAY

If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives,

DO GOOD ANYWAY

If you are successful, you win false friends and
true enemies,

SUCCEED ANYWAY

The good you do will be forgotten
tomorrow,

DO GOOD ANYWAY

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable,

BE HONEST AND FRANK ANYWAY

What you spent years building may be destroyed overnight,

BUILD ANYWAY

People really need help but may attack you if you help them,

HELP PEOPLE ANYWAY

Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth,

GIVE THE WORLD THE BEST YOU'VE GOT ANYWAY.

Two Questions To Ask

If you've seen 'The Bucket List', you know that it's about two men who have been told they have limited time on earth. They decide to create a list of experiences to complete prior to 'kicking the bucket'. Appropriately, they name this list, 'The Bucket List'.

The men travel to the far ends of the earth, experiencing the finest restaurants, the most beautiful views, racing fancy cars, skydiving... and then they find themselves overlooking the Egyptian Pyramids, discussing life. In their discussion, one of the characters says that 'The Pharaohs believed that in order to enter heaven, a person must affirmatively answer two questions: “Did you find joy in your life?” and “Did your life bring joy to others?”' The two sat in contemplation of those two questions.

I was quite inspired by those two questions. Both of equal importance.

Have you found joy in your life? We spend so much time staring at the door that is closed in our lives that we don't see the ten doors open to us. A wise man, Mr. Larry Larson, recently shared with me, 'you can't miss what you don't have'. But yet, we tend to focus so much of our energy on what we wish we had, who we wish we were and where we hope our lives head. Instead of missing what you don't have, can you find the joy in your own life? Can you be filled with happiness for no apparent reason? Can you wake up and thank your God for a new chance to make the world a better place? Can you find the joy in who you are, right here, right now.

Secondly, did your life bring others joy? Did you do something just for the purpose of making someone smile today? Did you go out of your way to make sure someone else felt special? Have you gone out of your comfort zone, just to pick someone's spirit up? Did you make someone laugh?

I think regardless of your faith, your focus or your goals, these questions are a simple way to pull us back on track in our lives when we are not sure if we are on the right path.

One of the last experiences fulfilled on 'The Bucket List' was to 'laugh until you cry'.

I wish you tears of joy this week as you set forth on living each day fully. If we live each day without expectation of another, we truly would live without regret, would be unafraid to take chances, and wouldn't have to wait for a dramatic experience to see the wonders of the world.

Here's to your journey, and finding the joy.